As children grow into adults, their relationships with their parents evolve—sometimes for better, sometimes for worse. According to therapist Jor-El Caraballo, there are a few simple yet profound phrases that can significantly impact these evolving relationships. Here’s a closer look at the three key expressions that adult children long to hear from their parents.
“I’m Sorry”
The first phrase that can make a world of difference is “I’m sorry.” Caraballo points out that as members of Generation X, Millennials, and some from Generation Z reflect more critically on their upbringing, they begin to understand the full impact of their parents’ decisions on their lives. “In some cases, these choices have posed challenges to their mental health,” says Caraballo. For adult children looking to break negative family cycles and move forward with better mental health, hearing their parents acknowledge mistakes and offer apologies can be incredibly validating.
“I’m Proud of You”
The second powerful phrase is “I’m proud of you.” Regardless of age, children—yes, even adult ones—crave recognition and pride from their parents. “Many aging parents raised their children to aim higher and achieve more than they could, which has instilled a mix of confidence and performance anxiety in many of us,” Caraballo explains. Hearing “I’m proud of what you’ve accomplished and who you’ve become” can serve as a beacon of support for aging Millennials who might doubt their achievements and place in life.
“I’m Still Here for You”
Lastly, the phrase “I’m still here for you” reassures adult children that parental support does not end when childhood does. “The parental role doesn’t end when a child reaches adulthood. The relationship simply changes,” Caraballo advises. He emphasizes the importance for parents of adult children to find the right boundaries while maintaining an active presence and offering ongoing support. This reassurance can be crucial as it reinforces the parents’ role in their adult children’s lives as a source of stability and care.
Understanding these phrases can guide parents in providing the emotional support that fosters healthier and more fulfilling relationships with their adult children. For parents of grown children, knowing what to say—and when to say it—can make all the difference in nurturing these matured family dynamics.
