They are fulfilled three decades of a brave decision in a difficult time. A confession that few public figures dared to do. In October 1994, with REM at the peak of popularity, their leader He felt the need to explain to the world who he was: “I simply said that, throughout my entire adult life, “I had enjoyed sex with men and women.” Michael Stipe has never regretted it. He feels “proud” of not having hidden his sexuality: “Coming out of the closet has made me a better person.”.
In the fall of 1994, after almost 15 years of experience, REM was preparing to promote 'Monster', their ninth studio album. They would also go on tour. More than five years had passed since the previous one, 'Green Tour'. Until then, the leader of the Athens, Georgia, gang thought that his sexuality was a private matter. “As a public figure, I had exposed myself too much and I wanted to keep something just for me”, explained in NME. “There came a time when that was ridiculous and I decided to speak publicly about it.”
for years had been speculated around his sexual orientation. It had even spread the rumor that he had AIDS. Stipe denied it and, as he later admitted, went through a very difficult time: “It was a terrifying time for people like me – a 22-year-old queer man – who You couldn't take a test anonymously without some concern. I mean, with Reagan, lest we forget, there was a time when they talked about internment camps for those who tested positive for HIV. I waited five years to take the first anonymous test,” he revealed in Rolling Stone.
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In one atmosphere of homophobic hostilitiesStipe needed to gather his strength to explain to the world who he was. He wasn't gay, straight, or bisexual.. It was described as “an equal opportunity lascivious person“. This is how he remembered his coming out in The Guardian: “It was September 1994.and my band, REM, had released the two biggest albums of our career. With 'Out fo time' and 'Automatic for the people' we had sold more than 25 million copies worldwide and we were preparing to tour for the first time in five years. I was more famous than I could have ever imagined.. To promote our next album, 'Monster', and its world tour, I decided to publicly announce my sexuality. I simply said that, For my entire adult life, I had enjoyed sex with both men and women. It was a simple fact, and I'm glad I announced it.”
It was the first time. But not the last. Michael Stipe never publicly hid his sexuality. He spoke about it with pride. In 1995 was 'Out' magazine cover (popular American publication dedicated to the LGBT world). In 1999, the writer Douglas A. Martin published his first novel titled 'Outline of my lover' in which the narrator has a romantic six-year relationship with the – unidentified – lead singer of a successful Athens bandGeorgia. The book gave rise to numerous speculations and, finally, it was confirmed that the author had had an affair with Stipe.
In 2001 was described as “queer artist” in Time magazine and revealed that he had kept a romantic relationship with “a surprising man” for three years. Stipe reiterated this in an interview 2004 with 'Butt' magazine (a publication about gay and queer alternative culture) when asked if had he ever declared himself gay. His response was: “I haven't done it. I think that “There's a line between being gay and queer, and to me, queer describes something that's more inclusive.”
Already in 2011, in The Guardian, he stated: “Definitely, I prefer men to women. I had sex and enjoyed sex with women until I met someone who I fell in love with and who is now my boyfriend.” He was referring to his current partner Thomas Dozolartist and photographer with whom share your life between New York and Berlin. In 2014 it was rumored that they had secretly married.
In October 2014, for celebrate the 20th anniversary of coming outMichael Stipe wrote an article in The Guardian: “In 1994, most people I had a binary perception of sexuality – the message was complicated for them. I feel excited about see how much everything has changed this.” The artist was “delighted” by “the amount of gay rights that have been achieved in recent decades.” He recalled that “at that time, There weren't many public figures who had taken the step of telling their truth.. I felt happy to be with those who had done it. And he concluded: “These 20 years speaking publicly about my truth they have made me a better and easier person to relate to”.
Thomas Dozol, Michael Stipe and Elton John at the 15th edition of the gala held by the Elton John AIDS Foundation / Kevin Mazur
In 2019, 25 years later, the REM leader spoke with Billboard about those days. As he said, He believed that the other members of the band – Bill Berry, Peter Buck and Mike Mills – knew of his sexuality before confessing it publicly. “I never hid it… that's the beauty of it and I feel very proud. You can't find a single picture of me trying to get a girlfriend or being someone I'm not.. I was never that kind of person. Any former R.EM fan. that he wouldn't imagine that I was queer before that moment it's just that he didn't pay much attention”.
However, Michael Stipe prefers not to put a name to his sexuality. Hence his famous phrase: “I have always felt that Sexuality is a really slippery thing.. These days, there is a tendency to categorize and label, and I think that The labels are for food. For canned food”. (Out Magazine, January 1999)
